7 Ways to Reignite Your Sex Life Before and After Menopause

We chatted with Sofie Roos, a sexologist, couples’ counsellor and author at Passionerad, about how to keep your sex life healthy and exciting during and after menopause. Here’s what she recommends:

1) Embrace changing desires

Sofie points out that your libido can totally shift during menopause. Maybe your sex drive drops, maybe it grows, or maybe you crave deeper intimacy. Whatever happens, go easy on yourself.

“Don’t fight it—see this time as an invitation to explore your sexuality in new ways,” she suggests. “Letting go of old expectations opens up space for even more pleasure and excitement.”

2) Lube up for better sex

Vaginal dryness is a classic menopause struggle thanks to those pesky hormones, and it can make things uncomfortable—sometimes even painful. That’s when many women start to avoid sex.

“Seriously, a quality lube is a total game-changer,” Sofie insists. Don’t be shy—slather it on and enjoy silky smooth action every time.

3) Take your time with foreplay

Hormonal changes often mean you’ll need more time to get in the mood. Give yourself permission to linger over foreplay and spice things up with something new.

“Experiment with long massages, deep kisses, snuggling, or gentle teasing. Don’t forget about vibrator—toys are your best friend for boosting arousal and sensitivity,” Sofie laughs.

4) Explore solo pleasure

Sex doesn’t always mean being with a partner. Menopause is the perfect excuse to reconnect with your body and figure out what feels amazing.

“Try erotic books, watch some adult movies, pick out new sex toy and don’t forget that trusty lube,” she suggests. Give yourself time and be patient if it takes a bit to discover new turn-ons—this is your pleasure journey!

5) Be open with your partner

If you’re in a relationship, being real about your changing needs makes everything easier (and hotter!).

“Talk honestly about how your body’s shifting, what you want, and what feels good now. Setting boundaries and sharing fantasies keeps things intimate—and makes sex way more enjoyable for you both,” Sofie encourages.

“The more you communicate, the more relaxed you’ll feel. Hiding your feelings just adds tension and stress, and that’s a total desire-killer. Remember, you’re a team.”

6) Strengthen your pelvic floor

“Pelvic floor exercises are brilliant for enhancing sensitivity and making orgasms even more intense,” Sofie says. Give Kegel balls a go—combine them with lube and you’ll really notice the difference during menopause.

7) Keep the fun alive

Let’s be real: sex should be playful, not a chore. Sofie always reminds us that it’s all about enjoying the moment and having a laugh together.

“Drop the pressure to perform or ‘do it right’. When you’re relaxed and curious, you’ll naturally unlock new desires and discover what turns you on now,” she says. Have fun with it—your sex life is yours to shape!

Most women suffer in silence

Stats don’t lie: women in menopause face an average of 5.4 symptoms, including hot flushes, insomnia, mood swings, low sex drive and more. Over half deal with symptoms daily, yet 67% don’t see a doctor. 41% felt isolated during menopause, only 36% knew about hormone therapy, and just 34% were aware of non-hormonal solutions.

So if you’re going through menopause or perimenopause, don’t let anyone tell you your pleasure days are over. With the right mindset and a few trusty Desirel.co.uk essentials, this stage can be your sexiest ever.

Source: HVG.hu